pear tree log: I started this blog to keep my younger son, Jonny, in touch with life in Lincolnshire, while he spent a year working in China. That year turned into five! Now he is home and training to become a physics teacher. This is simply a patchwork quilt of some of the things I enjoy - life in rural Lincolnshire, our animals, friends, architecture, books, the gardens, and things of passing interest.

Saturday, 4 May 2013

Today I Made a Difficult Decision

Regular readers know how much I loved my dear and reliable companion of many years, Toby.    

He has been in failing health for a while now and this morning I had to take the decision
to have him put to sleep.


I won't disable comments, but please forgive me if I don't reply.
It is all too raw and too painful.


  1. I truly understand. HUGS.
    Jane xxx

  2. Good bye, old friend. Keep watch.

  3. THERE is sorrow enough in the natural way
    From men and women to fill our day;
    And when we are certain of sorrow in store,
    Why do we always arrange for more?
    Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware
    Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
    Buy a pup and your money will buy
    Love unflinching that cannot lie
    Perfect passion and worship fed
    By a kick in the ribs or a pat on the head.
    Nevertheless it is hardly fair
    To risk your heart for a dog to tear.

    When the fourteen years which Nature permits
    Are closing in asthma, or tumour, or fits,
    And the vet's unspoken prescription runs
    To lethal chambers or loaded guns,
    Then you will find - it's your own affair, -
    But ... you've given your heart to a dog to tear.

    When the body that lived at your single will,
    With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!),
    When the spirit that answered your every mood
    Is gone - wherever it goes - for good,
    You will discover how much you care,
    And will give your heart to a dog to tear!

    We've sorrow enough in the natural way,
    When it comes to burying Christian clay.
    Our loves are not given, but only lent,
    At compound interest of cent per cent,
    Though it is not always the case, I believe,
    That the longer we've kept 'em, the more do we grieve;
    For, when debts are payable, right or wrong,
    A short-time loan is as bad as a long -
    So why in - Heaven (before we are there)
    Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?

  4. Oh my . . . I ache for you. Love Toby's picture with turned up ear, coal black nose . . . sweet memories I am sure and the loss so difficult to bear . . .
    My caring . . .

  5. Oh, I am so sorry to read this. No words will comfort right now but I do know that time will help to heal your heart. You know that Toby was one of the lucky ones. To know love and to give love all his life is a dream for some dogs. Toby had a wonderful life and now the memories are what will soon bring a smile to your face. Take care of yourself. Toby would want that. Hugs, Deb

  6. Thinking of you on the loss of your beloved Toby. Much love. x

  7. so sorry to hear your sad news Elaine. Hug xxxxx

  8. So sad - most of us have been through this. At least you know he had a good life.

  9. How terribly sad for you. What a sweet old dog he was and yet, I can see pain in that darling face. It was kind of you to put an end to that for his sake.

  10. I'm so sorry to read your sad news. He sure did have a good life with you. groetjes, Gerda

  11. Oh Elaine. My heart aches. Thinking of you. There's a cup of tea and a cookie with your name on them any time you need some sweet love. The Viking sends his love too. Big hugs xxxx

  12. My heart aches for you. Holding you in my heart. Bonnie

  13. Its one of the most heartbreaking things to do thoughts are with you. He was a lovely boy, loved his pictures on your blog. xxxxx

  14. Elaine I am sure it breaks your heart. I hope you find peace and solace to know Toby suffers to more. Hugs.

  15. Dear Elaine,
    Those of us who love our dogs, cats, horses--know too well the sadness that is with you. And yet, I think we are blessed that we can do this last kindess for our animals, gently relieving them when their infirmities become intolerable.
    Each pets holds an irreplaceable spot in our affections and memories.
    My kindest thoughts go out to you,

  16. Goodbye old boy. I only knew you via your photo, but you looked like such a lovely chap.

  17. God bless dear sweet Toby

  18. I'm so sorry :( How fortunate Toby was to have you there for him when he needed you most. I really think this is why we are allowed to be the stewards of animals - to help ease their transitions when they can't do it themselves. Much peace to you in the days ahead. xo

  19. I'm so sorry to hear about Toby and know how much you are hurting right now. We had to make the distressing decision to allow our beautiful 15 year old Gem to die a better death than she would have had if we had allowed her illness to take its course. I don't for one minute regret the decision - but oh, how it hurt. Time does heal.

  20. My heart and thoughts are with you Elaine,
    I am so sorry about your Toby.
    I have lost a few dogs over my years... and i never forget them.
    I have 5 dogs at the moment.. and when i think about one going.. i become so depressed and sad.
    He is resting now.
    much love Elaine..
    val xxx

  21. Dear Elaine, I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Toby looks like he was such a fine dog. It is always heart-breaking to lose a dear pet.

  22. "The more I see of men, the more I like dogs."

    Every day I see the same decision creeping ever closer. My heart is so sad for you Elaine.


  23. Thank you for all your kind comments and support. Each one brought a fresh cascade of tears. I won't pretend to be anywhere near done with crying yet, especially when faced with kind words, but I'm sure I'll get there - in the meantime I will have to pretend I am suffering from exceptionally bad hay fever! x

  24. Dearest friend, I know how you're feeling; our pets are so much a part of our family and it will take a long time to heal. Just know, you are in my thoughts, XOXO

  25. so very sorry for your loss of such a sweet boy

  26. My heart breaks for you. I have had to make the decision many times, and it is never easy. I am sure Toby will stay with you in spirit and your hay fever will get better :)

  27. So sorry to hear this, Elaine. Our pets bring so much to our live that it is hard to let them go. In everything I've learned about you from your blog, it is apparent that Toby was much loved and his life was grand.

    Take care.


  28. So sorry to hear about Toby. That's a decision that's so hard to deal with, even though it's the right one. My thoughts are with you and I'm sending you virtual hugs. I hate this part of having pets. :(

  29. Oh how sorry I am for your loss. It seems when we experienced a loss of our beloved pets our heart is left so bruised. Here is a poem that although might seem rather sad, brought me comfort when I had to put my Roxy down in 2008.

    Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
    All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
    You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
    Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
    Author unknown...


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